老友记第一季完整编辑中英文对照.doc

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1、101 The One Where Monica Gets a New Roommate (The Pilot-The Uncut Version)Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are there. Monica: Theres nothing to tell! Hes just some guy I work with! Joey: Come on, youre going out with the guy! Theres gotta be something wrong with him! Chandler:

2、 All right Joey, be nice. So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece? Phoebe: Wait, does he eat chalk? (They all stare, bemused.) Phoebe: Just, cause, I dont want her to go through what I went through with Carl- oh! Monica: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. Its just two people goin

3、g out to dinner and- not having sex. Chandler: Sounds like a date to me. Time Lapse Chandler: Alright, so Im back in high school, Im standing in the middle of the cafeteria, and I realize I am totally naked. All: Oh, yeah. Had that dream. Chandler: Then I look down, and I realize theres a phone. the

4、re. Joey: Instead of.? Chandler: Thats right. Joey: Never had that dream. Phoebe: No. Chandler: All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. Now I dont know what to do, everybody starts looking at me. Monica: And they werent looking at you before?! Chandler: Finally, I figure Id better answer it, and

5、it turns out its my mother, which is very-very weird, because- she never calls me! Time Lapse, Ross has entered. Ross: (mortified) Hi. Joey: This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself. Monica: Are you okay, sweetie? Ross: I just feel like someone reached down my throat, grabbed my small intestine, pul

6、led it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck. Chandler: Cookie? Monica: (explaining to the others) Carol moved her stuff out today. Joey: Ohh. Monica: (to Ross) Let me get you some coffee. Ross: Thanks. Phoebe: Ooh! Oh! (She starts to pluck at the air just in front of Ross.) Ross: No, no dont!

7、Stop cleansing my aura! No, just leave my aura alone, okay? Phoebe: Fine! Be murky! Ross: Ill be fine, alright? Really, everyone. I hope shell be very happy.101101 试播试播没什么好说的！他不过是我的同事！少来了，你和那个人一起出去！拜托，和你交往的男人一定有问题！打住，乔伊，嘴下留德。他驼背？既驼背又带假发？慢着，他吃粉笔吗？我只是不想你重蹈我和卡尔的覆辙。各位别急，这不算约会。我们不过是出去吃晚餐，而且不做爱。听起来好像是说我的约

8、会。记得中学时代的梦，我站在自助餐厅，突然发现自己全身赤裸。我做过那样的梦。我低头一看，看见有一支电话在那儿。而不是？没错。我没做过那样的梦,没有。那支电话突然响起，而我不知道怎么办，每个人都开始望着我。他们以前不看你吗？！终于，我认为我应该接，结果是我妈打来，我感到很奇怪，因为我妈不曾打过电话给我！嗨。这家伙向我打招呼时我就想自杀。你还好吧？我感觉有人把手伸入我的喉咙，抓起我的肠子，从我的口中取出，然后绑在我脖上饼干？卡罗今天把她的东西搬走了。- 我帮你泡杯咖啡，谢了。不要别清理我的灵气。可是别碰我的灵气就是了。Monica: No you dont. Ross: No I dont, to

9、 hell with her, she left me! Joey: And you never knew she was a lesbian. Ross: No! Okay?! Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didnt know, how should I know? Chandler: Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian. (They all stare at him.) Did I say that out loud? Ross: I told mom and dad last night, the

10、y seemed to take it pretty well. Monica: Oh really, so that hysterical phone call I got from a woman at sobbing 3:00 A.M., “Ill never have grandchildren, Ill never have grandchildren.“ was what? A wrong number? Ross: Sorry. Joey: Alright Ross, look. Youre feeling a lot of pain right now. Youre angry

11、. Youre hurting. Can I tell you what the answer is? (Ross gestures his consent.) Joey: Strip joint! Cmon, youre single! Have some hormones! Ross: I dont want to be single, okay? I just. I just- I just wanna be married again! (Rachel enters in a wet wedding dress and starts to search the room.) Chand

12、ler: And I just want a million dollars! (He extends his hand hopefully.) Monica: Rachel?! Rachel: Oh God Monica hi! Thank God! I just went to your building and you werent there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are! Waitress: Can I get you some coffee? Monic

13、a: (pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross? Rachel: Hi, sure! Ross: Hi. (They go to hug but Rosss umbrella opens. He sits back down

14、defeated again. A moment of silence follows as Rachel sits and the others expect her to explain.) Monica: So you wanna tell us now, or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids? Rachel: Oh God. well, it started about a half hour before the wedding. I was in the room where we were keeping all the prese

15、nts, and I was looking at this gravy boat. This really gorgeous Lamauge gravy boat. When all of a sudden- (to the waitress that brought her coffee) Sweet n Lo?- I realized that I was more turned on by this gravy boat than by Barry! And then I got really freaked out, and thats when it hit me: how muc

16、h Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head. Yknow, I mean, I always knew looked familiar, but. Anyway, I just had to get out of there, and I started wondering Why am I doing this, and who am I doing this for?. (to Monica) So anyway I just didnt know where to go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted

17、apart, but youre the only person I knew who lived here in the city.好吧，保持晦气！我会没事的，真的，我祝她幸福。- 不，你不会的，没错，- 我不会的，去她的，她甩掉我！而且你一直都不知道她是女同性恋者。没有！行了吧？！为何大家都围着这个话题打转？连她不知道，我怎会知道。有时真希望自己也是个女同志。我刚刚大声说出来了吗？昨晚我告诉我父母，他们好像还挺好。真的吗，凌晨三点我接到一个电话，一个女人歇斯底里的向我哭诉，“我不能抱孙子了，我不能抱孙子了。”那是什么？打错了？对不起。别闷闷不乐了，罗斯。你现在很痛苦。我一肚子火,心如刀割。

18、能告诉你解决之道吗？脱衣舞酒店。你单身，有性需求。我不想单身的。我只想再结婚。我只想要一百万！- 瑞秋？！- 天啊，莫妮卡，谢天谢地！我到过你的住处，你不在。有个拿着一根大榔头的人说你可能会在这儿，结果你真的在这儿。想来杯咖啡吗？无咖啡因的。各位，她叫瑞秋，另一位从林肯高中生存下来的人。这位叫钱德勒，菲比，乔伊。还记得我哥罗斯吗？当然。嗨。你想现在告诉我们，还是等伴娘来再说？婚礼前半个小时发生了变数。我在堆放礼物的房间里，看着船形卤肉盘，非常漂亮的船形卤肉盘，突然间有没有代糖？我了解船形卤肉盘此巴瑞更能引起我的“性趣”，我自己都吓了一跳，巴瑞愈看愈像猪头先生。我一直都认为他Monica: Wh

19、o wasnt invited to the wedding. Rachel: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldnt be an issue. Scene: Monicas Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV and are trying to figure out what is going on. Monica: Now Im guessing that he bought her the big pipe organ, and shes really not ha

20、ppy about it. Chandler: (imitating the characters) Tuna or egg salad? Decide! Ross: (in a deep voice) Ill have whatever Christine is having. Rachel: (on phone) Daddy, I just. I cant marry him! Im sorry. I just dont love him. Well, it matters to me! (The scene on TV has changed to show two women, one

21、 is holding her hair.) Phoebe: If I let go of my hair, my head will fall off. Chandler: (re TV) Ooh, she should not be wearing those pants. Joey: I say push her down the stairs. Phoebe, Ross, Chandler, and Joey: Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! (She is pu

22、shed down the stairs and everyone cheers.) Rachel: Cmon Daddy, listen to me! Its like, its like, all of my life, everyone has always told me, Youre a shoe! Youre a shoe, youre a shoe, youre a shoe!. And today I just stopped and I said, What if I dont wanna be a shoe? What if I wanna be a- a purse, y

23、know? Or a- or a hat! No, Im not saying I want you to buy me a hat, Im saying I am a ha- Its a metaphor, Daddy! Ross: You can see where hed have trouble. Rachel: Look Daddy, its my life. Well maybe Ill just stay here with Monica. Monica: Well, I guess weve established whos staying here with Monica.

24、Rachel: Well, maybe thats my decision. Well, maybe I dont need your money. Wait! Wait, I said maybe! Time Lapse, Rachel is breating into a paper bag. Monica: Just breathe, breathe. thats it. Just try to think of nice calm things. Phoebe: (sings) Raindrops on roses and rabbits and kittens, (Rachel an

25、d Monica turn to look at her.) bluebells and sleighbells and- something with mittens. La la la la.something and noodles with string. These are a few. Rachel: Im all better now. Phoebe: (grins and walks to the kitchen and says to Chandler and Joey.) I helped! Monica: Okay, look, this is probably for

26、the best, yknow? Independence. Taking control of your life. The whole, hat thing. Joey: (comforting her) And hey, you need anything, you can always come to Joey. Me and Chandler live across the hall. And hes away a lot. Monica: Joey, stop hitting on her! Its her wedding day! Joey: What, like theres

27、a rule or something? (The door buzzer sounds and Chandler gets it.) Chandler: Please dont do that again, its a horrible sound. Paul: (over the intercom) Its, uh, its Paul.很眼熟。总之,我必须离开。我开始想，我为何这么做？我为谁这样做？于是我不知该走往何处，我知道你我日渐疏远。但是你是我在这个城市，认识的唯一一个人。好像是唯一没受邀参加婚礼的人。这件事就甭提啦。我猜他送她一台管风琴，她肯定不喜欢，金枪鱼还是鸡蛋沙拉？快决定！我

28、要拥有克莉丝汀拥有的一切。爸，我不能嫁给他对不起，我只是不爱他。对，是我的问题！如果我没了头发，还不如去死。她不该穿那条裤子。我建议推她下楼，推她下楼！推她下楼！推她下楼！爸，你听我说大家这样评价我这一辈子：你是一只鞋今天我倒想看看如果我不再是鞋会怎样。我说如果我想当皮包呢？或是帽子呢？不，我不需你帮我买帽子。我说我是一顶帽子。爸，这是一种比喻。你看他也有些问题。爸，这是我的人生。或许我会和莫妮卡住在这儿。我想我们已确定好谁要和莫妮卡住在这儿。或许那是我的决定。或许我不希罕你的钱。等一下，等一下我说的是或许！深呼吸，就这样。试着想着美好的事物玫瑰上的雨滴，猫嘴上的胡须，门铃和雪橇之类的。啦 啦

29、 啦还有手套我现在好多了。Monica: Oh God, is it 6:30? Buzz him in! Joey: Whos Paul? Ross: Paul the Wine Guy, Paul? Monica: Maybe. Joey: Wait. Your not a real date tonight is with Paul the Wine Guy? Ross: He finally asked you out? Monica: Yes! Chandler: Ooh, this is a Dear Diary moment. Monica: Rach, wait, I can

30、cancel. Rachel: Please, no, go, thatd be fine! Monica: (to Ross) Are, are you okay? I mean, do you want me to stay? Ross: (choked voice) Thatd be good. Monica: (horrified) Really? Ross: (normal voice) No, go on! Its Paul the Wine Guy! Phoebe: What does that mean? Does he sell it, drink it, or just c

31、omplain a lot? (Chandler doesnt know.) (Theres a knock on the door and its Paul.) Monica: Hi, come in! Paul, this is. (They are all lined up next to the door.). everybody, everybody, this is Paul. All: Hey! Paul! Hi! The Wine Guy! Hey! Chandler: Im sorry, I didnt catch your name. Paul, was it? Monic

32、a: Okay, umm-umm, Ill just-Ill be right back, I just gotta go ah, go ah. Ross: A wandering? Monica: Change! Okay, sit down. (Shows Paul in) Two seconds. Phoebe: Ooh, I just pulled out four eyelashes. That cant be good. (Monica goes to change.) Joey: Hey, Paul! Paul: Yeah? Joey: Heres a little tip, s

33、he really likes it when you rub her neck in the same spot over and over and over again until it starts to get a little red. Monica: (yelling from the bedroom) Shut up, Joey! Ross: So Rachel, whatre you, uh. whatre you up to tonight? Rachel: Well, I was kinda supposed to be headed for Aruba on my hon

34、eymoon, so nothing! Ross: Right, youre not even getting your honeymoon, God. No, no, although, Aruba, this time of year. talk about your- (thinks) -big lizards. Anyway, if you dont feel like being alone tonight, Joey and Chandler are coming over to help me put together my new furniture. Chandler: (d

35、eadpan) Yes, and were very excited about it. Rachel: Well actually thanks, but I think Im just gonna hang out here tonight. Its been kinda a long day. Ross: Okay, sure. Joey: Hey Pheebs, you wanna help? Phoebe: Oh, I wish I could, but I dont want to.我的功劳。或许这样最好，要自立，决定自己的事情。有任何需要找乔伊准没错。我和钱德勒就住在对面，而且他

36、经常不在家。乔伊,少趁虚而入了，今天是她大喜的日子。什么？有规定不能吗？别再这样，声音很刺耳。我是保罗。天啊，6:30了吗？让他进来！保罗是谁？调酒的那个保罗？或许吧。等等,你今晚该不是真的要和调酒的那个保罗约会吧？他终于开口约你了？对。终于被你等到了。瑞秋，等等，我可以取消。不用了，你去吧，我不会有事的。罗斯，你没事吧。你要我留下来吗？那样最好真的吗？- 假的，去吧！是保罗，调酒师耶！什么意思？他是卖酒的，喝酒的，还是评酒的？请进！ 保罗，这位是各位，各位，他就是保罗。保罗调酒大师。抱歉，我没听清楚你名字。保罗，是吗？我马上就好，我去，去神魂恍惚啦？换衣服！请坐，两秒钟。我刚拔掉四根睫毛，不

37、妙。嗨，保罗！ 嗯，有何指教？一个小秘密，莫妮卡其实就喜欢这样，你摩擦她脖子的同一个地方，反反复复，直到那里开始有点发红。乔伊你给我闭嘴！瑞秋，你打算如何渡过今晚？Commercial Break Scene: The Subway, Phoebe is singing for change. Phoebe: (singing) Love is sweet as summer showers, love is a wondrous work of art, but your love oh your love, your love.is like a giant pigeon.crapping

38、 on my heart. La-la-la-la-la- (some guy gives her some change and to that guy) Thank you. (sings) La-la-la-la.ohhh! Scene: Rosss Apartment, the guys are there assembling furniture. Ross: (squatting and reading the instructions) Im supposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch

39、 of these little worm guys. I have no brackety thing, I see no whim guys whatsoever and- I cannot feel my legs. (Joey and Chandler are finishing assembling the bookcase.) Joey: Im thinking weve got a bookcase here. Chandler: Its a beautiful thing. Joey: (picking up a leftover part) Whats this? Chand

40、ler: I would have to say that is an L-shaped bracket. Joey: Which goes where? Chandler: I have no idea. (Joey checks that Ross is not looking and dumps it in a plant.) Joey: Done with the bookcase! Chandler: All finished! Ross: (clutching a beer can and sniffing) This was Carols favorite beer. She a

41、lways drank it out of the can, I should have known. Joey: Hey-hey-hey-hey, if youre gonna start with that stuff were outta here. Chandler: Yes, please dont spoil all this fun. Joey: Ross, let me ask you a question. She got the furniture, the stereo, the good TV- what did you get? Ross: You guys. Cha

42、ndler: Oh, God. Joey: You got screwed. Chandler: Oh my God! Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Paul are eating. Monica: Oh my God! Paul: I know, I know, Im such an idiot. I guess I should have caught on when she started going to the dentist four and five times a week. I mean, how clean can teeth get? M

43、onica: My brothers going through that right now, hes such a mess. How did you get through it? Paul: Well, you might try accidentally breaking something valuable of hers, say her- Monica: -leg? Paul: (laughing) Thats one way! Me, I- I went for the watch. Monica: You actually broke her watch? Wow! The

44、 worst thing I ever did was, I-I shredded by boyfriends favorite bath towel. Paul: Ooh, steer clear of you.我应该在前往阿鲁巴渡蜜月的途中，因此没了！我懂，你没去渡蜜月。虽然阿鲁巴在此时有很多大蜥蜴，如果你今晚不想独处，乔伊和钱德勒要到我那儿帮我组合新家俱，对，我们都相当兴奋。谢谢，但我今晚想待在这儿，我折磨了一天。好吧，当然。菲此，想帮忙吗？我可以去，但我不去。爱情似炎炎夏日中的阵雨般美妙，love is a wondrous work of art,but your love oh y

45、our love,your love.is like a giant pigeon.crapping on my heart.啦-啦-啦-啦-啦- 谢谢。我应该用蜗杆将托架装在侧面，但我没看见托架和蜗杆，而且，我的脚好麻。我想我们做好书架了。真漂亮。这是什么？我只能说这是个“L”型托架。是哪儿的？我也不知道。书架做好了！终于做好了！这是卡罗最爱喝的啤酒。她总是不用杯子喝，我早应该看出蛛丝马迹。嗨如果你再这样，我们就走了。对啊，请不要破坏这里的乐趣。罗斯，我问你一个问题。她分得家俱，音响和好电视。你分得什么？你们。天啊。你昏头了吧。Monica: Thats right. Scene: Moni

46、cas Apartment, Rachel is talking on the phone and pacing. Rachel: Barry, Im sorry. I am so sorry. I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isnt. it isnt, its about me, and I ju- (She stops talking and dials the phone.

47、) Hi, machine cut me off again. anyway.look, look, I know that some girl is going to be incredibly lucky to become Mrs. Barry Finkel, but it isnt me, its not me. And not that I have any idea who me is right now, but you just have to give me a chance too. (The maching cuts her off again and she redia

48、ls.) Scene: Rosss Apartment; Ross is pacing while Joey and Chandler are working on some more furniture. Ross: Im divorced! Im only 26 and Im divorced! Joey: Shut up! Chandler: You must stop! (Chandler hits what he is working on with a hammer and it collapses.) Ross: That only took me an hour. Chandler: Look, Ross, you gotta understand, between us we havent had a relationship that has lasted longer than a Mento. You, however have had the love of a woman for four years. Four years of closeness and